If you have to choose between what I’m saying and how I look while saying it, you will intuitively discount my words and believe what you see
If I am dropping eye contact or checking texts messages or rotating my shoulders while you are speaking, you don’t feel heard – even if I tell you I’m listening and can repeat every word you just said. Here’s why . . . Most explanations of human behaviour assume that people are strongly influenced by…
Your audience is assessing your tone of voice, facial expressions, hand gestures and posture for clues about your credibility
As more interactions move from in-person environments to online events, your ability to project virtual leadership presence is quickly becoming the key to your continued success. Whether you’re interviewing for a new job, presenting to the executive team or facilitating a team meeting, you’re most influential when you express your core values and show up…
Charisma is all about an individual's infectious positive attitude and personal energy, as projected through body language
Charisma has been described as personal magnetism or charm. To me, charisma is all about an individual's infectious positive attitude and personal energy, as projected through his or her body language. People are the most charismatic when they are genuinely enthused, confident and upbeat about themselves and their topic. And as a leadership coach, I…
Feet close together, you're timid or hesitant; feet wide apart, you look more solid and sure of yourself
Two of your colleagues are talking in the hallway. You'd like to join the conversation, but you don't know if you'll be seen as a rude interruption or a welcome addition. Want to find out? Just watch their feet. When you approach the twosome, you will be acknowledged in one of two ways. If the…
If you want to be evaluated as authoritative, understand what’s at stake in any situation and adjust your body language accordingly
Before the meeting began, Adam assumed a power pose: standing with hands on hips and feet wide apart for two full minutes to get all the advertised benefits of doing so. It worked. He could almost feel his stress level lowering and his self-confidence rising. By the time he strode into the conference room, took…
Don’t let physical distancing make loneliness worse. Here are three tips to reduce isolation and increase connection
The message is simple: Work from home, don’t meet in person – or if you must get together, keep your social distance! But as we increase our efforts to fend off the spread of COVID-19, we need to watch that we aren’t worsening another threat to public health: loneliness. The ‘loneliness epidemic’ has seen rates…
The high achievers of today are not so much a product of superior expertise as they are a product of superior networks
What really distinguishes high performers from the rest of the pack is their ability to maintain and leverage large, diversified networks that are rich in experience and span all organizational boundaries. Ironic, isn't it? Here we are, smack in the middle of the Information Age, discovering that our greatest advantages aren't coming from what we know…
Research shows that your posture affects both how you feel and how others perceive you
My name is Carol and I’m a posture junkie. It all began with the reaction I saw when I was introduced as a speaker who writes and lectures about body language. I watched as people automatically changed their posture. They held their heads higher, pulled their shoulders back and tightened their abdominal muscles. In doing…
Making sure you understand the kind of signals your body is sending is important every time you are talking to someone
One time, during a radio interview entitled "What you're saying without speaking," I was asked to comment on the host's body language. He was a very good sport about being critiqued in public, and he quickly understood that, in order to change your body language, you must first be aware of what your body is…
It takes ongoing teamwork to produce innovative, cost effective and targeted products and services
Most leaders agree that effective collaboration is more important than ever. In a "do-more-with-less" reality, it takes ongoing teamwork to produce innovative, cost effective and targeted products and services. In fact, a company's very survival may depend on how well it can combine the potential of its people and the quality of the information they…
Most workplace lies (and liars) are discovered after the fact – it's time to put an end to the cycle and end the lies before the harm is done
Most workplace lies (and liars) are discovered after the fact – after you’ve signed the faulty contract, hired the wrong person or agreed to work on that career-limiting project. Wouldn’t it be great (as well as a professional advantage) to spot liars in action, before the harm was done? To sharpen your lie-detection ability, follow…
If the interviewer stops in the middle of your conversation to practice golf swings, forget about a job offer
As the candidate in a job interview, you’re aware that you’re being assessed for competence, confidence and candor. But what about the interviewer? Is he or she being totally upfront with you? Here are 10 clues that will tell you what the interviewer really thinks: 1. If the interviewer says he "could go on talking…
People are two times more likely to remember you if you shake hands with them
Apparently there is some controversy over the question of whether businesswomen should hug or shake hands. My vote goes to the handshake. Here’s why: A study on handshakes (by the Income Center for Trade Shows) showed that people are two times more likely to remember you if you shake hands with them. The trade-show researchers…
Your nonverbal communication is more powerful at conveying emotions than the content of your message itself
Do you know that your team is constantly evaluating your emotions through cues in your body language – and that they can do so in a fraction of a second? At the Center for Cognitive Neuroimaging at the University of Glasgow, researchers found that it takes only 200 miliseconds to read someone’s emotional state from…
We all tend to mimic the facial expressions and reflect the mood of those with whom we have contact
It started out a wonderful day. The sun was shining and I was singing along with my favourite radio station while driving through unusually light traffic to the San Francisco airport. Then, as I turned into the airport parking lot, a driver abruptly pulled in front of me and glared through his rear-view mirror. At…