In the world of sports for example, becoming successful is contingent on positive habits
When we talk about habits, most of us immediately reflect on those we wish to break or remove. Habits like smoking, overeating, alcohol consumption, gambling and chewing ones nails, etc. seem an easy pattern to fall into, but stopping them somehow seems so much harder. We start out with such great intentions towards daily exercise…
The greatest gift you can give yourself is to accept your limitations and honour those activities that make you feel good when you do them
Canadians are expected to spend significantly less this Christmas season – or so the story goes – but that doesn't mean the holiday stress will melt away. The other night, my husband and I headed to the local mall to see what we could check off our Santa list. In spite of the mall being nearly…Getting your message across effectively can be difficult while giving a presentation, or during a job interview or when dealing with an upset person
Communication can be a real challenge. When you're feeling pushed, it's that much harder. Whether you’re giving a presentation, attending a job interview, dealing with an upset person, or simply conversing at work or in your personal life, ensuring you get your message across – and, equally important, hearing what the other person is saying…
One of the real pluses of being an Empty Nester is that you are no longer on view as a role model 24/7
Free at last, free at last! The children have grown up and moved away, your house is your own to do with what you will and your schedule is now open to anything you wish to pursue. So why are you so divided in your feelings? Empty Nest syndrome hits when your daughter or son…
Intuition is your unconscious self recognizing circumstances before your intellectual self does. You should be listening to its voice
I once spoke at a conference where a lot of pre-seminar chatter was about the need to trust one’s intuition, especially when it comes to safety. This is a great discussion point, but a lot of people simply don’t allow intuition a chance to alert them or they ignore the obvious signs when intuition is…
Creative solutions to complex and challenging problems come from a willingness to constructively navigate civilized disagreements
Conflict is natural and often unavoidable. But when emotion takes centre stage, it can lead to hostility. We've all encountered unproductive, frustrating or infuriating situations. We know how they make us feel. What's often less obvious is the degree to which nonverbal nuances contributed to the problem. Take the way our facial micro gestures (specifically around…
Take your mind off automatic pilot and get it to work for you rather than against you
When left to our own devices, we humans have the capacity to create 'worst case scenarios' that play around in our heads unchecked and often without boundaries. When this happens, it paralyzes us and prevents us from speaking up when someone hurts our feelings, springing into action on an exciting opportunity or doing what needs…
When someone dies, the loss is often more widespread than we recognize, and the tragedy and permanence of death shocks and scares us
I once found out (on Facebook of all places) that a dear friend had passed away suddenly. I was in shock. Had it been April Fool’s Day, I might have believed it was someone’s inappropriate joke. But it wasn’t. I didn’t know what to say or what to feel. I was numb. One of my…
Focus on your characteristics and skills, allowing other people to determine for themselves which skills are useful for the job and which aren’t
We detect the confidence of others automatically, whether we think we’re perceptive or not. Confidence is conveyed in words, posture, voice tone and gestures. Whenever we communicate with others, our minds are watching for mismatches – alerting us to a person's lack of sincerity. This can spell disaster when we're interviewing for a new job or…
Resentment over wrongs, disagreements over the kids and financial worries can be breeding grounds for some of the worst adult behaviour
They loved each other so much. Everyone thought they were a perfect couple. Of all the couples in their circle, they definitely had the advantage, communicating so well with each other. That’s what we all thought – until they got divorced! When that perfect couple is at an impasse, why start fighting like children? Communication…
Don't waste your energy on something that is not worth wasting your energy on
You don’t have to love them, but life is so much easier when you are polite to people, regardless of how they behave toward you. Have you ever had to deal with offensive customers, or colleagues? It can be a real challenge to keep your cool when your inner voice is screaming, “You’re a jerk!…
If you want to motivate people, setting a good example is a good place to start
Motivating yourself can be difficult at times, but motivating other people offers a different kind of challenge. Short of standing behind them with a pitchfork and an evil grin, or offering them a gazillion dollars, what can you do to get the best from others, be they employees or colleagues or even family (although that’s…
Body language cues are most accurate when a speaker is initially put on the spot. So ask candidates hard questions and watch closely
What makes interpreting the sincerity of all those election promises so darn challenging? All the prep time a candidate has gets in the way. Interpreting the nuances of non-verbal communication requires us to detect fleeting cues and they’re more accurate when an individual hasn’t had the luxury of polishing up their rebuttal. Body language cues…
A body language expert looks at Trudeau's latest apologies and analyzes their sincerity
Prime Minister Justin Trudeau seems to be paying attention to experts when they share what it takes to offer a sincere apology. I suppose he ought to – after all, he spent a term being that kind of leader: one who leans on apology to help boost his public image. I’m not saying this is…
Focus on these three Cs — calm, collected and confident
Too often, we’re exposed to the energy-sucking power of worry. What a waste. But you can do something about it. When I was a young mom, I worried about making mistakes raising my children. I was so concerned about scarring them for life. It seemed that every article I read eluded to poor parenting as…